There was a time when people kept up appearances. Things could get a bit stuffy, even. Then along came the great soul-baring revolution of social media, which pretty much obliterated the idea that some things, perhaps, should remain off limits.
Fashion is no stranger to this tell-all aesthetic with its almost competitive sport of hemlines, second-skin cuts and see-through. The once half-smile relish in a certain je ne sais quoi has become a wide-eyed stare of incredulity.
But with the decline of mystery comes the decline of elegance and the unique narratives told through subtlety and charisma. The signature look is going the same way as the cursive signature itself and what a pity.
This is not a plea for Victorian necklines, but for a renaissance of the classy and the smart – a wardrobe that evokes intrigue and allure through tailoring, hints and suggestions, such as ballet-neck styling instead of fashion reminiscent of other kinds of dance. Remember Audrey Hepburn? Grace Kelly? Right.
1. Mini-skirts always seem to be on the menu, but here’s the test: upon sitting, if the fabric of the skirt doesn’t cover your knickers, it is too short. Pencil skirts and A-line midis, on the other hand, are always chic, whether the hemline hits just above the knee or just below.
2. The sheer layer is meant to be worn over another layer, such as a tank or camisole. This trend comes and goes but common sense should not.
3. Tunic shirts are shirts, not dresses, and require some kind of leggings or trousers. Please don’t skip your trousers. Similarly, leggings are meant to be worn under something.
4. Oh, those pesky lines! What you wear underneath should be your own business, regardless of posh brand.
5. What will it take to stop the madness of super-skinny jeans? Slim-fit jeans are one thing, but can we please bid adieu to those that leave seam indentations all the way up your legs and incite other unintentional and unflattering results?
6. Super-short cut-off jeans or shorts? Unseemly, even with tights underneath, and the cause of much personal injury to the hapless souls following up the stairs. A minimum three-inch inseam should be maintained at all times. (Preferably five.)
7. Zippers should serve a functional purpose and for most pieces, be hidden or downplayed (i.e. blend in with the fabric). The look-at-the-giant-zipper-running-down-my-back thing is distracting (not in a good way).
8. Neon should be for signs or for your aquarium, not your wardrobe.
9. There are high heels and there are running shoes; never the twain should meet in a bizarre hybrid.
10. Pyjamas in public? Is it such an ordeal to put on actual clothes?
There are so many phenomenal fashion designers in the world and beautiful, flattering, and yes, elegant pieces to be found at every price point. It takes a bit of effort, but so does getting to know someone. Imagination is so underrated.